Guilty Pleasures and Burn Out

Unfortunately I didn’t turn into Spider Woman which I feel would have been very helpful. I am instead burnt out and running on much caffeine, I say running on caffeine but it actually alternates between having a calming effect or just sending me to sleep.

I haven’t written for a week, my writing class is done until September when I start a new one and I miss it already. This week has been mental, we’ve had sports day, a three day weekend, second born just turned ten, a school trip on the hottest day, eldest just finished year 9 (I know I look farrrrrr too young – according to the general public not a brag), a birthday day out topped off with a very moany and knackered Sunday (myself included). Sunday is my least favourite day, I’ve never liked Sundays. Everyone’s like yeahhh ‘Sunday reset’, have a roast. No. Sundays are slow and not in a good way. Oh and what the fuck is a reset? Do you mean tidying your house?? Because my idea of a reset is sitting lying down outdoors and no one talking to me. Tidying is just a never ending task. Wednesdays are superb, love a Wednesday. Found myself looking through old baby photos last night, I miss tiny baby toes and no one saying they don’t like me because they can’t have another ice lolly. To be fair my little moon beam did pipe up and say “I like you” which was nice.

Still not ordered uniforms, wongk! Facebook keeps suggesting teachers from the kids school as friends. I have known teachers and I’m pretty sure they don’t want to be found outside of school to the point that they change their names. I still don’t know whether it’s bad etiquette to say hello when you see one in the wild supermarket, even that feels like an invasion of their privacy so like what the fuck facebook?? I hate the suggested friend feature in general, like here’s someone your actual friend met on holiday maybe you should connect? Yeah, because that’s normal. Another odd one is receiving random friend requests from strangers, I get this a lot on my private account which has no distinguishable features to say it’s me. What does it all mean Basil?? My WhatsApp is the same, it just has a silly username from when I set it up, someone recently thought it was Husband Face’s WhatsApp and thought my username was his actual name which (if you knew what it was) was pretty funny.

I hate to admit it but planning things is so much more exhausting than doing them. The fun thing about having ADHD and being autistic is that there are two ideals for how things should be done trying to coexist in one brain hence the burn out. Worse than that is trying to articulate it without feeling like you’re just failing at being an adult human. Was feeling fed up last night then remembered that I’d bought Ben and Jerry’s, one of the great joys of being an adult is that you can just eat ice cream straight from the tub when you’ve not even had dinner! Oh and better still the Real Housewives of Orange County is back and I’m so happy. It is one of my guilty pleasures. I literally signed up to the HayU app just to watch it and I will absolutely not forget to cancel it once the season’s up this time. It’s just so ridiculous, imagine having so much money and wasting your time arguing in restaurants. So entertaining though. I love Travis.

Alas, nonsense.